SB

So I 'yumcha' with my SB (secret buddy), Ivan and I'm  not gonna blog about what we talked about cus' it was sort of private but I just wanna write something out of it. Me and Ivan got close during choir practice and we've been good buddies ever since, he's an amazing listener and would listen to my problems and at many times he hit me right in the spot when I'm trying to cover up something. I don't really compliment guys, or even girls but he's someone I truly appreciate. 

Honestly my bffs never thought that I'm mature enough, or that word just doesn't describe me. Is it that maybe I'm always clinging onto them and make decisions without much hesitation , I'm not sure but no one calls me mature. Except for two guys. One of them is Ivan. I wouldn't say I'm very mature, I call it I experienced certain circumstances earlier than most people do, and I'm glad I did. I always thought that I'm a coward in making decisions, I tend to rely or follow other people's opinions and just when I decided to step out of my comfort zone, the first step felt great but deep down I know it risks a part of me. I challenged myself, I took the chance. People may think I'm taking the chance without much consideration but I thought, it's great, you feel the danger you feel the fear yet it's just thrilling to be on this road you chose to take. An eye for an eye, you took the chance, you risked yourself and of course you'll have to face the heart- wrenching consequences. It's just pretty surprising how I climbed out from the pit so fast. I was surprised by myself too. It's either I didn't fall deep, or is it I chose to ignore the fact and covered it up with laughter and hobbies. Ivan asked me, are you ignoring it or I've already moved on? I have no idea either. Guess I'll just put my trust on God. He'll lead, always.